Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Very Useful Phrases For All Sorts Of Foreign Situations

Have you ever been in ancient Rome, stranded in a hovercraft full of eels, thinking, "DAMNIT! If only there were some way I could communicate my predicament to the people around me? Curse my fool self for never taking Latin!"* Well, if this has happened to you (and who hasn't this happened to?), or if you're just concerned about the prospect of getting caught in a similar situation, today is the blog post for you.

All of the following, very useful travel phrases are brought to you courtesy of the Live Journal community SF_Drama. I hope they help you as they have truly helped me.


  • Je suis le grande pomplemousse. I am the big grapefruit.
  • Je suis le petit lutin de papier photosynthetique! I am the little photosynthetic paper goblin!
  • J'ai manger les mauvais herbes de la mer. I ate rotten seaweed.
  • Je vais te violer avec un grand couteau. I am going to rape you with a big knife.
  • Le chat est dans le bonbons. The cat is in the candy.
  • Je suis un petit champignon heureux. I am a happy little mushroom.


  • Wo de pigu zhao huo le. My ass is on fire.


  • Su perro es en la tostadora. Your dog is in the toaster oven.
  • Mis pompis estan comiendo mis pantalones. My butt is eating my pants.
  • El diablo esta en mi pantalones. The devil is in my pants.
  • El gato es muy salado. The cat is very salty.


  • Umeboshi tabetai boku wa imasugu kimi ni aitai. I want to eat pickled plums and I am longing to see you right now.
  • Samurai wa watashi no pantsu no naka ni imasu. The samuri is in my panties.
  • Saru-tachi ga toushokan no naka ni imasu. Ooi hon o tabemashita. There are monkeys in the library. They have eaten a lot of books.
  • Ohana ni narimashita. I became a flower.
  • Chinko ga haitteru kaban wo kue. Eat a bag of dicks.
  • Toshokan (w)o tabenai de kudasai. Please, do not eat the library.

Now, I take no responsibility for the accuracy of these phrases. They're just copypasta from the loveliest community on LJ. I also take no responsibility for your dumb ass if you actually use these for other than hilarious purposes. And if you get beaten up for saying something you found here, please put the footage on YouTube.

*The phrase you'd be searching for is: Mea navis aƫricumbens anguillis abundat. Don't you wish you'd taken Latin now?

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