Monday, August 16, 2010



"Oh no! Abuela es muerte! We need to go into the underworld to save her! Can you say Underworld? SAY UNDERWORLD!"



"Who do we ask for help when we don't know which way to go? The map! Say map! LOUDER!"



"When there's a place you gotta go, I'm the one you need to know, I'm the map. If there's a place you gotta get, I can get you there I bet, I'm the map! What's my name? Say it again!

Dora and Boots need to rescue Abuela from the underworld. She'll need to go across the river Styx..."



"...past Cerberus the three-headed guard dog..."



"...and into the mouth of Hades!"



"Tell Dora: Styx, Guard Dog, Mouth of Hades! Styx, Guard Dog, Mouth of Hades! Styx, Guard Dog, Mouth of Hades!"



"Come on, vamanos! Everybody let's go! Come on, let's get to it, I know that we can do it!"



"We need to pay the boatman to cross the river Styx. I think I have something in my backpack that will help. Can you say backpack? Say it LOUDER!"



"Backpack Backpack! Backpack Backpack! Yay! Dora needs something to pay the boatman, so she can cross the river Styx! Can you see something she can use to pay the boatman?"



"Yum yum yum yum yum! Delicioso!"



"We made it all the way to Hades! Now, we just have to lead Abuela out! You have to look straight ahead and not look back! Can you look straight ahead and not look back?"



"Oh no, it's that sneaky fox, Swiper! To keep Swiper from looking back and thus condemning Abuela to the City of the Damned for all eternity, say 'Swiper, no looking back!' Swiper, no looking back! Swiper, no looking back! Swiper no--"



"Awwww man!"



"Abuela, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"







THE. END.

5 comments:

  1. Oh. Oh my god. Oh. Oh my god. Oh. Oh my god. This may just be the finest piece of writing ever conceived. I need to actually get a Twitter so I can actually follow you, rather than randomly stalking your Twitter feed and religiously visiting your blog.

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  2. Sometimes, I love you so hard it hurts.

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  3. Words can not describe how disturbingly hilarious this is. I thank you. xx Jilly

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  4. You have managed to combine classic mythology and a much-hated children's show (gods, was I glad when she got out of that stage) to create...poetry. [applause]

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  5. Haha! This was awesome. *shares on Facebook*

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Say some stuff! If you can't think of anything to say, leave a link to a cute dog picture. I'm easy.